Friday, December 26, 2008

If anyone has ever lost a child....

then you know what I am going through.

I know I haven't been online lately but for good reason. I finished my three weeks of training at the Police Academy but on the day before my graduation, I was admitted into the hospital. I was pregnant but did not know it. I was having severe lower abdominal pain and the leaders forced me to go to the hospital. Good thing. I was pregnant in the right tube and I had to have emergency surgery. The baby was inside the right tube and they had to remove that one AND they went ahead and removed the left tube because they said it was severely damaged and bleeding.

I was by myself and very emotional but happy to be alive. The doc said I might would have died had I not came in. My husband and I weren't planning on having more children but we weren't prepared for all of this. I'm still emotional but getting better everyday. My husband just acts like it never happened. I guess he's still dealing with the death of his mother. He never even mentions the baby.

Please pray for me and my family during this difficult time. This is our fourth child we have lost and I think I'm having a harder time with this loss because I know I will never have another child.

I am out of work until the 6th of January and will probably return to work on light duty. I am planning on cleaning my scraproom tomorrow and starting some new layouts. Scrappin' always seems to be good therapy for me so I am looking forward to drowning myself in creativity.

Until next time, God Bless!

Nik

4 comments:

Erika said...

Wow! I'm so sorry to hear about your loss! I can't say that I have ever been through this but I can just imagine how horrible you must feel. I pray that you stay strong and that your friends and family are there to support you!! Keep your head up sweetie!! {{{HUGS}}}

Scrappymom said...

Oh My Gosh!! I'm so sorry to hear about your loss!!

~tablescraps on sb.com

Colleen said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your loos, but glad you got the medical help when you needed it. I too have gone through a loss in the form of miscarriage and no one understands unless they've been there how devastating it is. I'm thinking of you and all of your family in this difficult time...

Karen Lee said...

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. But, thank goodness you went to the hospital. I'm sure your husband is feeling the pain of the loss, but remember sweetie, men grieve silently. They aren't much for talking about things they can't fix.

Hugs to you and your family.

ScrapperK from sb.com